GrowHealChange
Thoughts, musings, announcements, and information about all things related to living your best life: mind, body, and spirit.
Wednesday, October 14, 2015
Don't Cry
How many times have you said this to someone or had someone say it to you?
I have so many vivid memories of my mom telling me not to cry, or not to worry when I was a little one. Now that I am a psychotherapist, my heart skips a little beat each time I hear these words uttered.
By telling someone not to cry, not to worry, not to stress, not to be mad, etc. we are telling them that their feelings aren’t real or are not valid.
We often say these words out of the goodness of our hearts as it hurts us to see people we love in pain, but doing so only adds to the pain. Think of it this way– when do we ever say, “don’t be happy. don’t laugh.” Almost NEVER. We rarely stifle happiness and joy, so why should we stifle sadness, worry or other feelings? Yes, we want to help our friend or loved one and reduce their pain, but if there is one thing I have learned as a therapist, it’s that sitting with someone’s pain is helpful, it is cathartic, and it most definitely is pain relieving.
By sitting with someone in their pain and suffering you are truly saying, “I’m here for you, we are in this together.” Allowing our friends, kids, partners, parents, siblings, neighbors to feel their pain, and acknowledging it we are indeed allowing them time to heal.
- Kathleen Hill, MS, NCC, LAPC
Kathleen is a therapist with TRU Integrative Health and Wellness. Kathleen works with children, adolescents and adults around a variety of issues, and has both weekday and weekend hours available. Click here to see Kathleen's bio or to contact her directly.
Saturday, July 18, 2015
Spiritual Experiences, Challenges and Resources for Support
By: Shaye Hudson MA,
Psychotherapist & Clinical Hypnotherapist
We
have talked about what is a Spiritually Transformative Experience in
the previous blog and how it can affect the experiencer. We know that
each person will be affected differently a particular spiritual
experience but there will often be challenges that will show up in
different areas of their lives. Also, integrating these experiences
can be especially difficult for those living in cultures that are not
as supportive of these often strange and difficult to understand
experiences that often result in less than accepting responses from
friends, family members and others. It is important that the
experiencer, clinicians, and other professionals involved have a
general understanding of these potential challenges and where they
can go to get support.
Spiritual
Experiences and Western Culture
Modern
societies and those in Western culture generally have an impoverished
understanding of such spiritual or religious matters. There is a
tendency for Westerners to use a scientific or even a religious
worldview to explain away such experiences as just neurons firing in
the brain or stating that the experience violates some holy
declaration. I have found that due to these cultural norms, the
spiritual experiencer may often hesitate to tell friends, family
members, coworkers, mental health, or medical professionals, due to
fears of being invalidated or even labeled as psychotic.
Spiritual
Experiences and Mental Health
There
has however, been progress in the mental health community in the
distinguishing between what is determined to be a pathology and what
is a problem. Practitioners in the mental health field refer to the
Diagnostic Statistical Manual (DSM V) and the code “V62.89
Religious or Spiritual Problem.” This is a very helpful code that
mental health practitioners can use to acknowledge distressing
spiritual experiences as non-pathological problems.
While
some will not have any significant issues after their experience,
common challenges may include:
·
Processing a radical shift in their worldview
·
Accepting their new perspective
·
Experiencing “homesickness”
·
Issues related to sharing the experience
·
Integrating new spiritual values, and changing ones religious
beliefs
·
Problems dealing with psychic experiences
·
A desire to find, and live one’s purpose.
The
spiritual experiencer, depending on their life situation and other
factors, may have difficulty with depression, anxiety, isolation,
divorce, financial distress, or substance abuse. The above situations
could potentially require a mental health professional with a
transpersonal orientation or competency to assist individuals in the
area of religious or spiritual issues.
Spiritual
Experiences in Supportive Cultures
Eastern
and tribal-centric cultures often have a history, lineage, and
psychological framework accustomed to providing support and
integrating the spiritual or mystical experience. The Tibetan
Buddhists have the “Tibetan Book of the Dead” to help integrate
their encounters. The Senoi, a Stone Age tribe in Malaysia, consider
the dream world to be more real than the waking world and have daily
practices of dream interpretation. Also, some Native American
cultures are known to have more supportive communities that were
generally more welcoming of such extraordinary experiences.
Resources
for Spiritual Experiencers
We
in the West have the opportunity to create more of a conducive
social, cultural and psychological framework to help others who have
these transpersonal experiences. Where can people in the modern
cultures and the West who have had such transcendent encounters find
a supportive resource or community to help Integrate in a healthy,
safe, supportive way?
I
have personally found resources that were invaluable in helping not
only myself but others process and integrate their experiences with a
sense of community, acceptance and validation. You can find local
support by contacting a professional or group affiliated with--or
having received training from-- but not limited to, the following
organizations:
American
Center for the Integration of Spiritual Experiences (ACISTE)
International
Association of Near Death Studies (IANDS)
The Monroe Institute (TMI) TMI has an International Local
Chapter Network and Outreach Facilitators that can provide local
support in their groups.
Psychology Today: Online resource for Psychotherapists and
Clinical Hypnotherapists with Transpersonal, Humanistic, and related
orientations with specialties in spirituality.
https://therapists.psychologytoday.com
We
have come to understand that unlike many other cultures, the west may
not have as supportive culture and container to help many people
integrate have what they believe are spiritual experiences. Many are
often hesitant to share their encounters due to ridicule or even
condemnation. We also have seen how these experiences can be both
positively transformational and at the same time challenging. In some
cases, the person may require a Therapist, Coach or spiritual
counselor who can assist them in a healthy adjustment to their
transcendent or peak experiences.
Shaye
Hudson, MA, CH.t is a Psychotherapist and Clinical Hypnotherapist in
Atlanta, GA with a Transpersonal orientation and training, who
specializes in Spiritually Transformative Experiences. He is also a
Reviewer for the Journal of Exceptional Experiences and Psychology.
www.growhealchange.com
Saturday, July 4, 2015
What is a Spiritually Transformative Experience?
By: Shaye Hudson MA,
Psychotherapist & Clinical Hypnotherapist
“We
are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings
having a human experience.-Pierre Teilhard de Chardin”
In
the last
blog, we covered some examples of reported spiritual experiences. We
hear the amazing accounts from those who have had Near-death experiences, Out
of body, After-death communications and more but in what ways can and do these
encounters affect the experiencers? We will now be covering a standard
definition or understanding of what is a
spiritually transformative experience.
According to the American Center for the Integration of Spiritual Experiences (ACISTE) an STE is “an experience that causes an individual to perceive themselves and the world profoundly differently: by expanding the individual’s identity, augmenting their sensitivities, and thereby altering their values, priorities and appreciation of the purpose of life. This may be triggered by surviving clinical death, or by otherwise sensing an enlarged reality.”
Expanding
the Individuals Identity
Many of us go thought our everyday lives experiencing life
as who we know ourselves to be. We grow up in certain geographic location
inheriting the customs and expectations of that culture. We grow up listening
to the influencing truths of our parents ranging from what’s acceptable from a
religious, political, and even a the kind of relationships and vocations we
choose. We receive these templates and make some minor or major adjustments
along the way. Our mindsets are formed though the templates placed upon us and
through life experience. Imagine going through
your daily life and this mindset being interrupted by some sort of transcendent
experience. The truths we have been known and lived up to this point have been
disrupted allowing a new worldview to emerge and thus making room for an
expanded identity to take form.
I have personally gained some understanding of spiritual experiences after having my own transpersonal encounters and after listening to clients. Many also report an expanded identity to include the spiritual. They no longer see themselves as just a physical human being, but one with an eternal spiritual essence or nature. A by-product of this new identity is the reduction of the fear of death, emotional healing and confirmation that the spiritual world is a reality for them.
Augmenting
their Sensitivities
Many clients report that after their experience, they feel
more emotionally and intuitively sensitive. Whether this is a spiritual,
psychological, emotional or physical symptom it doesn't matter because all these
aspects affect one another. What matters is that the person may need help with
first coping with their new sensitivities. These new sensitivities can result
in anxiety and a feeling of being overwhelmed from being around large crowd’s
as well emotional sensitivity in relationships causing arguments or hurt
feelings. In some cases the experiencer may require learning to create
boundaries and not let the emotions of family, friends, coworkers and even
strangers affect their moods by just by being around them.
Altering Values, Priorities, and Appreciation of the Purpose
of Life
Imagine
having a Near-Death experience or a spiritual encounter with a deceased loved
one and receiving a message that life is about love. You have been climbing the
corporate ladder with a Machiavellian “ends justify the means” attitude and now
grandma give you a gentle and loving reminder to be nice. This may be quite the adjustment and may
redirect the experiencer to consider a different practice or path in life.
With some
their experience may challenge their religious or lack of religious attitudes.
Their typical programming has been challenged and often altered during the
experience. This new perspective can
cause one to rethink their views on both life and the afterlife and open a
“Pandora's box of questions, thus creating a thirst for answers and spiritual
seeking.
With these
changes jobs, relationships and friendships may fall away and along with this
comes the stresses of change. This transformative encounter can be the just
beginning of the potential challenges the person may experience.
In the next blog in
this series, we will cover some common challenges for the spiritual experiencer
and resources for support and integration.
Shaye Hudson, MA, CH.t is a Psychotherapist and Clinical Hypnotherapist in
Atlanta, GA with a Transpersonal orientation and training, who specializes in
Spiritually Transformative Experiences. He is also a Reviewer for the Journal
of Exceptional Experiences and Psychology. Shaye facilitates weekly spiritual groups at Tru Integrative Health & Wellness.
www.growhealchange.com
www.growhealchange.com
Tuesday, June 30, 2015
Four Common Types of Spiritual Experiences
By: Shaye Hudson MA,
Psychotherapist & Clinical Hypnotherapist
In
this blog, we will be discussing some of the type’s experiences and
encounters that clients have shared with me in the previous blog.
Many of us have read in bestselling books of those who have died and
came back to life in the near death experiences, others having out of
body experiences gaining an expanded sense of identity, after-death
encounters with loved ones who have crossed over and other peak
experiences. There are a multitude of other variations of
transpersonal experiences but in this continuation of we will cover
some of the more commonly reported experiences.
Near-death experiences (NDEs)
According
to the The International Association For Near Death Studies (IANDS),“An
NDE may begin with an out-of-body experience—a very clear
perception of being somehow separate from one’s physical body,
possibly even hovering nearby and watching events going on around the
body. An NDE typically includes a sense of moving, often at great
speed and usually through a dark space, into a fantastic landscape
and encountering beings that may be perceived as sacred figures,
deceased family members or friends, or unknown entities. A pinpoint
of indescribable light may grow to surround the person in brilliant
but not painful radiance; unlike physical light, it is not merely
visual but is sensed as being an all-loving presence that many people
define as the Supreme Being of their religious faith. “
Clients
have reported the positive effects from their Near Death experience
to include an expanded spiritual perspective, a reduced fear of death
and a sense of deep meaning in their lives. Many report a certainty
of life after death and how our loved ones are more than okay, and
the lesson is to learn to be more loving.
On
the other hand, I have heard stories of interpersonal, relationship,
and intrapsychic problems. I have found that my response as the
therapist can have a critical influence for those with the NDE
experience. If their experience is validated it can lessen negative
emotional resistance and is generally more easily integrated in a
healthy way.
A
counselor, coach or spiritual director with training in spiritual and
religious problems can help in situations with family members that
have that they have a difficult time adjusting to the new beliefs
and attitudes. There are times where marriages are strained and even
divorce can occur. The NDE-experiencer can also undergo anger,
depression, withdrawl from the experience and other attitudes that
can affect their psychosocial functioning. In situations like this,
it may be necessary that the experiencer receive outside help to
adjust to their new way of being and the ripple effects it may cause
in some or the majority of areas in their life.
Out-of-body experiences (OBEs)
The Monroe Institute (TMI) is a nonprofit education and research
organization which focuses on the exploration
of human consciousness. This organization has residential and
outreach programs as well as
an International Local Chapter Network(ILCN) where participants experience
altered states of consciousness
through a patented sound technology called “Hemi Sync”. Many have
reported having the “Out
of Body” (OBE) and other transcendent experiences. Both TMI
researchers and participants report that the “OBE” is an experience that usually involves a subjective
sensation or experience of being outside one's body.
In
my therapy practice, I have listened to clients share having
experiences where they experiencing a paralysis, a buzzing sensation,
lifting out and even seeing their own physical body. Some have
reported that the “OBE” experience had a profound impact on
reducing their fear of death as well as changes in their identity
since they have come to experience themselves as more than the
physical body.
Past-life experiences
As
a part of my Hypnotherapy practice, I facilitate both - individual
and group Past Life Regression sessions. I have had clients report
amazing stories of how they lived in places and times that they did
not expect. Some clients report having an experience of remembering
during waking states or having a direct experience of a past life
through hypnosis, dreams or other non-ordinary states. Past lives
are associated with the idea of reincarnation, which is the religious
or philosophical concept that the consciousness or spirit can (after
physical death) return to another life in a new body. This doctrine
is an integral part of various ancient and modern religions.
On
occasion, clients report being the opposite gender, which is very
amusing and even sometimes unsettling. Some shared that they were
with people who they knew were people in their present day lives. In
many cases the client can gain insight on their present day issues
and relationships and use the experience to empower themselves for
positive change.
After-death communications (ADCs)
These are experiences where a person
has communication with a physically deceased person. This can
generally happen during waking states, meditative, and dream states.
ADC's often include sensing a presence, hearing voice, feeling a
touch and other physical phenomena, smelling a fragrance, and visual
encounters.
I
have shared my personal experience ADC experience in my earlier blog
and have also listened to a multitude of clients share their stories
of contact with deceased loved ones with numerous combinations of
the states of consciousness well as the sensory types. I have found
that these ADC type experiences can be very healing to those who are
experiencing grief and loss.
Shaye
Hudson, MA, CH.t is a
Psychotherapist and Clinical Hypnotherapist in Atlanta, GA with a Transpersonal
orientation and training, who specializes in Spiritually Transformative
Experiences. He is also a Reviewer for the Journal of Exceptional Experiences
and Psychology. Shaye hosts spiritual groups at Tru Integrative Health & Wellness.
www.growhealchange.com
Friday, June 19, 2015
A Therapist Supports Client Encounters with Loved Ones Who have Passed
BY: Shaye Hudson, MA, Psychotherapist & Clinical Hypnotherapist
There can be nothing more devastating in our lives as human beings than losing family members and loved ones. As a Psychotherapist and Hypnotherapist with a Holistic and Transpersonal (Spiritual) orientation, I often support clients who have experienced losing someone closest to them.
I had often wondered how a spiritual encounter with a deceased loved one would affect the grieving process. I wondered “What would you say or ask if you got one last chance to see and talk with them?” The day came when I would learn first-hand, the answer to my question and then come to listen to the answers of those with similar stories.
People experience and
cope with grief in their own unique ways and time. While some can cope with
their loss and recover with the support of those around them, others experience
deep and profound grief that can be debilitating. It can have a profound effect
on their psychosocial functioning in multiple areas of their lives such as
mental and physical health, personal relationships, work, and can even
challenge or reaffirm their personal religious faith.
Some of the clients that
I have worked with reported connecting with loved ones who have passed on from
this life and possibly existing in the next. The term After Death
Communication was coined by Bill and Judy Guggenheim,
authors and researchers on this subject of communication with those who have
died. Some of the typical reports from their research have
included dream visitations, sensing loved ones at the foot of the bed, hearing
a voice, feeling a touch, smelling fragrances, and seeing signs that were
meaningful and significant.
I have listened to
family members, friends, therapy clients, and others share some profound
stories of emotional healing. I will share two stories, one helping a woman
coming to terms with the end of her life and another where the experience has served
one in healing grief.
Janet's Dream
Visitations in Hospice
I was providing care for
a hospice patient named Janet. She was a mentally sharp woman in her late 80s,
but her body was slowing succumbing to cancer. On one of my visits, Janet
shared that she had been sleeping quite a bit due to the cancer.
This was my opportunity
to ask her about her dreams. She said “I would tell you but you may think I am
crazy”. I reassured her that I have a very open mind. Janet shared, “Well my
deceased daughter and parents are visiting me in numerous dreams and preparing
me to cross over to the other side.” I then asked, “Do you think this is just
your brain processing emotion or is this a real spiritual experience?” She
replied, “A real spiritual experience.”
As a clinician working in hospice, one of my primary goals in end of life care was to ensure that she was comfortable both mentally and emotionally, so I asked did this affect your fears around death. Janet replied “absolutely, I have no fear of death now.” Imagine if her Clinician did not share such an open mind and chose not to validate her feelings. I am thankful to have been there and able to support her through a very difficult stage of her life.
As a clinician working in hospice, one of my primary goals in end of life care was to ensure that she was comfortable both mentally and emotionally, so I asked did this affect your fears around death. Janet replied “absolutely, I have no fear of death now.” Imagine if her Clinician did not share such an open mind and chose not to validate her feelings. I am thankful to have been there and able to support her through a very difficult stage of her life.
Kayla's Agreement with
Grandmaw
I was supporting a
client by the name of Kayla who had been making trips back and forth from
Atlanta to her family’s hometown a few states away. She was visiting her
dying grandmother who she affectionately called her “Grandmaw”, (Kayla would
pronounce it long and drawn out with a thick country accent. She shared that
her Grandmaw would say it would sound similar to an ambulance if I was wining
enough). Kayla had been sharing over a course of our sessions that she had
anxiety around the loss of her grandmother and felt guilty for living so far
away from family.
Kayla was home one
weekend visiting her Grandmaw in home hospice. While there her Grandmaw shared
that she had a near death experience, where she went through a tunnel and went
to a place of love, met other family members on the other side, and was told it
was not quite her time.
During their time together Kayla and her grandmother made an agreement that when she passed she would visit her somehow to let her know she was okay.
Kayla is generally a skeptical person when it comes to things outside of the logical realm and she and her Grandmaw were often at odds about this topic, with Kayla often joking about her grandmother’s persistence in the existence of the afterlife.
During their time together Kayla and her grandmother made an agreement that when she passed she would visit her somehow to let her know she was okay.
Kayla is generally a skeptical person when it comes to things outside of the logical realm and she and her Grandmaw were often at odds about this topic, with Kayla often joking about her grandmother’s persistence in the existence of the afterlife.
Weeks later Kayla got
another phone call asking her to come and see her Grandmaw and was told “It was
getting close to that time.” Kayla went as soon as she could but she missed her
grandmothers passing by just a few hours. She felt immensely guilty about the
fact that she wasn’t able to see her grandmother again, especially since her
logical mind told her Grandmaw’s fire, that spirit had ceased to exist.
Kayla’s very existence was broken by it.
She went to bed the
night after her grandmother had passed and she couldn’t sleep well. She tossed
and turned until finally she fell asleep from exhaustion. Then she started dreaming.
In the dream, Kayla saw her grandmother with bright red hair. She knew how
upset her grandmother was when her hair had been shaved due to the chemo so
when she saw the bright red hair she knew something wasn’t quite right. Kayla
has had lucid dreaming experiences before and noticed that this was a dream.
However, this dream was different than the others.
She reported that it was very vivid and full of clarity and mindfulness. Her grandmother didn’t speak but did relay messages to her telepathically. She smiled with her bright read hair, red lipstick, and a rose in her hair. The whole time Grandma was relaying her messages she never stopped smiling. Kayla grabbed her tightly and looked her right in the eyes, knowing that this experience was the one they had discussed previous to her passing. Kayla mentally sent a message to the effect of “Are you okay? Are you in heaven? Someplace after death? Somewhere happy that you are happy?” Then a wave of confirmation hit Kayla and she knew the answer was yes. Kayla then asked something like “Do you still love me? Can you still actively participate/see my living my life? Are you still going to be around?” And another wave of confirmation hit her and this time it was filled with the overwhelming sense of unconditional love. Kayla let go of her grandmother’s shoulders and took her wondrous glare away from her grandmother’s eyes to hug and kiss her.
That hug and kiss felt like an everlasting impression of emotional comfort that Kayla shared she can still feel every day and knows that she will have for the rest of her life. Kayla found a deep healing in knowing her “Grandmaw” was okay and at the same time creating a new spiritual opening and curiosity about life.
She reported that it was very vivid and full of clarity and mindfulness. Her grandmother didn’t speak but did relay messages to her telepathically. She smiled with her bright read hair, red lipstick, and a rose in her hair. The whole time Grandma was relaying her messages she never stopped smiling. Kayla grabbed her tightly and looked her right in the eyes, knowing that this experience was the one they had discussed previous to her passing. Kayla mentally sent a message to the effect of “Are you okay? Are you in heaven? Someplace after death? Somewhere happy that you are happy?” Then a wave of confirmation hit Kayla and she knew the answer was yes. Kayla then asked something like “Do you still love me? Can you still actively participate/see my living my life? Are you still going to be around?” And another wave of confirmation hit her and this time it was filled with the overwhelming sense of unconditional love. Kayla let go of her grandmother’s shoulders and took her wondrous glare away from her grandmother’s eyes to hug and kiss her.
That hug and kiss felt like an everlasting impression of emotional comfort that Kayla shared she can still feel every day and knows that she will have for the rest of her life. Kayla found a deep healing in knowing her “Grandmaw” was okay and at the same time creating a new spiritual opening and curiosity about life.
I have listened to these
and other stories of those who had one last chance to see their loved ones,
asked final questions, and got tell them that they love them. In many cases the
one who passed on were coming to let them know that they were okay.
Their experiences and their stories can have a profound healing effect on those who are grieving the loss of family, friends and loved ones. Experiencers also report that their fear related to death has diminished and I have personally seen how it helped those who may be in the end stages of life to accept their time of transition with more peace.
It is my hope that regardless of what perspective that we both individually and collectively we take on these experiences, we can find the compassion and healing value in validating these very significant encounters for those who are grieving.
Their experiences and their stories can have a profound healing effect on those who are grieving the loss of family, friends and loved ones. Experiencers also report that their fear related to death has diminished and I have personally seen how it helped those who may be in the end stages of life to accept their time of transition with more peace.
It is my hope that regardless of what perspective that we both individually and collectively we take on these experiences, we can find the compassion and healing value in validating these very significant encounters for those who are grieving.
Shaye Hudson, MA, CH.t is a Psychotherapist and Clinical Hypnotherapist in
Atlanta, GA with a Transpersonal orientation and training, who specializes in
Spiritually Transformative Experiences. He is also a Reviewer for the Journal
of Exceptional Experiences and Psychology.
www.growhealchange.com
Saturday, June 6, 2015
A Therapist's Personal Spiritual Experience
BY: Shaye Hudson, MA, Psychotherapist and Clinical Hypnotherapist
Many
people often have experiences that we, in the psychology community
call ‘transpersonal’, 'spiritual' or ‘exceptional experiences of
consciousness.’ Exceptional psychology is a field that studies these experiences and phenomena which are traditionally related to parapsychology. Some examples of these type of experiences may include extra sensory perception, survival after death, out of body experiences, and after death communications. Depending on the nature of the experience and the
individual, one can find it to be very healing and positively
transformative.
Unfortunately, some refrain from sharing with friends, family members, and “professionals” (such as clergy and mental health professionals,) due to ridicule, invalidation, judgement or even been labeled as a “brick short of a full load.” There is a prevalent lack of openness and understanding in regards to these exceptional experiences. I am a little different than many of my peers in the field of Mental Health. I approach my clients and others with a different perspective--one of a fellow experiencer, and one educated in transpersonal or “spiritual” psychology, as well as a Psychotherapist.
Unfortunately, some refrain from sharing with friends, family members, and “professionals” (such as clergy and mental health professionals,) due to ridicule, invalidation, judgement or even been labeled as a “brick short of a full load.” There is a prevalent lack of openness and understanding in regards to these exceptional experiences. I am a little different than many of my peers in the field of Mental Health. I approach my clients and others with a different perspective--one of a fellow experiencer, and one educated in transpersonal or “spiritual” psychology, as well as a Psychotherapist.
Here
is my story: I was raised in the south in a small college town called
Milledgeville, GA. Almost every Sunday, my parents would take me and
my brother to go see our Granny, Annie Dean Garner, after church. She
had a quaint little house, with pictures of all the family members on
the walls, and a turquoise blue couch that I often played on in her
living room. She was a very sweet woman with long, brown and gray
hair that she kept braided on top of her head. She always wore her
glasses, and was warm and loving. I would spend the day hanging out
with her playing and helping around the house.
Later
on, during my early college years, we discovered that Granny had been
diagnosed with colon cancer. This was devastating to our family. I
remember my mom calling me and telling me “you’d better go visit
your Granny.” I went to the local hospital to visit her, and I
remember seeing her in the hospital bed. Although she was sick, she
was smiling and very appreciative that I came to see her. That would
be the last time I would see my Granny alive.
A
few days later, my mom and dad were notified by the hospital that
Granny was in a coma. I received a call and rushed to the hospital.
I ran into my father in the parking lot. He had a very concerned look
on his face, and, without saying a word to me, kept walking towards
his car. I quickly went inside, up the elevator and to the floor
where my Granny's room was located. I found my mother sitting there
crying. My mom explained that she was holding Granny's hand when she
took her last breath. My Dad could not stand to be there to watch her
pass.
Years
later, I had an experience that transformed my life in
a deep and profound way. One Sunday afternoon I was feeling tired, so
I chose to sit and meditate on my couch. I started to move into a
deeper state of meditation and began to feel my body less and less as
I rested with my eyes closed. I observed my thoughts, watching them
subside. As I was meditating deeper and deeper, I felt my head nod.
The third time I nodded, my head jerked. I opened my eyes and just
happened to look down at my couch. Something strange was happening.
My couch was normally beige, but now it was turquoise blue! When I
looked around, my vision seemed cloudy, but I could sense someone
sitting across from me.
I heard a familiar voice in my head say
"focus.”
I decided to focus and my vision cleared and I saw someone sitting
across from me in the room. It was my deceased Granny sitting in her
chair and smiling at me! I couldn’t believe what I was seeing!
I thought to myself, “I am making this up.” My vision became cloudy again and I heard the voice say “It’s your own fear and doubt getting in the way. You need to focus.”
I
focused on the figure in front of me and my vision instantly
cleared. I saw my Granny sitting only a few feet away from me—she
smiled and stared at me. Her brown and gray hair was still neatly
braided and she wore her beautiful white gown.
I decided to go along with the experience and told her "I miss you Granny, and I love you."
I decided to go along with the experience and told her "I miss you Granny, and I love you."
She
replied, “I love you too.”
I
asked, "How am I doing spiritually?"
Granny
replied, "You are doing well, but you should stay away from the
theological debates." (At the time, I had been having a rather
strong religious debate with a friend of mine.)
I
acknowledged Granny “I understand it is not my place to tell anyone
their beliefs are wrong.”
She
said "I love you. Take care of your father if he ever gets
sick.”
I
acknowledged Granny “I understand it is not my place to tell anyone
their beliefs are wrong.”
She
said "I love you. Take care of your father if he ever gets
sick.”
I
said "Granny, I need you to give me validation that this
experience is real and true.”
She
said, “Okay,” and led me into the kitchen where she showed me
squash and onions cooking on the stove.
She
said, "Ask your mother about the squash and onions she cooked
today."
I
said “I will Granny and I love you." I then felt myself coming
out of my deep meditation and back to my waking awareness.
When
I opened my eyes, the first thing I thought was that I needed to call
my parents to see if what my Granny told me was true. My heart was
beating fast with excitement as my dad answered the phone.
I asked
"Dad, did you eat squash with onions today?”
He
said "Yes. What are you doing, some kind of mind reading?”
I
replied "No, but you wouldn't believe me if I told you."
Dad put my mother on the phone and I asked her the same thing.
She
said: "Yes, I cooked squash and onions today and your aunt did
too." She asked me, “how did you know?”
I
told her, "I saw Granny and she told me what you did today.
Granny also told me to take care of dad if he ever gets sick."
I
am thankful to have seen my Granny again after her passing, in a non-ordinary or altered state of consciousness and having what I believe was a face-to-face encounter. This experience
had a powerful transformative effect on my life--I no longer feared
death. For me, I now have certainty that there is an afterlife, and
our loved ones are continuing their lives in another way. The
knowing she gave me in this encounter is what parapsychologists and
other researchers call “vertical evidence.” My Granny shared
corroborating information that I could then check, by telling me what
my mom cooked that day.
My
Granny did not come back to give me the secrets of the universe or
share the “right” religious beliefs. If anything, she urged me to
stay away from religious debates, and instead, guided me in another
spiritual direction. She came back to give me the simple message of
taking care of her son --my dad. It was a simple message of love.
This
profound experience helped me reconcile my emotions with not only the
loss of my Granny, but also with the passing of other family members
and friends. While the encounter has never taken away the initial
grief of saying goodbye, it has had the lasting effect of creating a
stronger ability within myself to understand and better cope with the
eventual passing of others close to me.
This
experience served as a significant catalyst for my evolution, both
personally and professionally. My biggest concern was no longer
whether or not I was going to ‘continue existing’ at the end of
my life, but now, how can I live to my fullest potential? If I were
to live to my fullest potential, I knew that my inner spiritual life
needed to be congruent with my outer life. My previous corporate
positions were not a good match for my newly-evolving spiritual life.
I realized that I had to follow my heart now, and move into a healing profession.
My
values shifted. No longer was I concerned primarily with achievement
and financial success. I was now more focused on serving and helping
others heal, grow, and transform in a deeper, more heart-centered
way. This life changing experience awakened a deep spiritual need
inside of me to become a Psychotherapist and Clinical Hypnotherapist,
with a specialty in religious, spiritual, and transpersonal issues
and experiences. I am now gratefully providing individual and group mental, emotional and spiritual support
for those with similar exceptional experiences.
I
send a very special thank you and I love you to my Granny, Annie Dean Garner.
Shaye Hudson, MA, CH.t is a Psychotherapist and Clinical Hypnotherapist in
Atlanta, GA with a Transpersonal orientation and training, who specializes in
Spiritually Transformative Experiences. He is also a Reviewer for the Journal
of Exceptional Experiences and Psychology.
www.growhealchange.com
Friday, March 6, 2015
The Patient’s Pen - Au Naturale: Adding Holistic Medicine to My Health Care Routine
Taking the first step into holistic medicine was a large leap for me. I was not raised in the stereotypical “natural” households where we shunned deodorant or ate only what we grew. My youth was a traditional one -- we went to the doctor, his word was law and the medicines we took were mandatory. But as an adult, I was continually hearing about natural healing and wondered, do I need to go this route? What are the benefits? Why isn’t traditional medicine helping me completely with my medical issues? What kind of reaction will I get from friends and family?
But, my medical issues are my own. And when, several months ago, I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism, a condition in which your thyroid gland does not produce enough thyroid hormones, I knew the medicine my MD prescribed was not enough. I knew that I needed to be doing more to restore my body to whole. And I learned that “natural” and “holistic” do not mean the “crunchy,” “granola” way of life I believed in my youth.
I started with research - what is natural medicine and how would it benefit me? I borrowed books from my friend including I’m Too Young for This, a great foundation for those seeking information on hormone and thyroid issues, written by Suzanne Somers, and Grain Brain by David Permutter, MD. These books gave me the confidence to walk the line between traditional medicine and natural medicine, and showed me how food plays an integral part in healing for many.
From there, I took the recommendation from this same (helpful, lovely) friend and found a local integrative care group. They took a myriad of tests and provided me with answers… my hypothyroidism is caused by Hashimoto’s, an underlying autoimmune disease. They prescribed a protocol which included prescription medicine as well as supplements to treat the deficiencies in my body that went along with Hashimoto’s.
For various reasons, things did not work out with my integrative healthcare group. I needed to change to a practitioner who would spend time with me, answer my questions and provide me the help I need as I need it. So I took my labs, my research and my desire to get better to Dr. Robert Truax at TRU Integrative Health & Wellness. Going forward, I am going to blog about my path to wellness. From what I have learned and accepted as I have become proactive about my health, there is no quick fix to Hashimoto’s - not via mainstream medicine or holistic medicine. Hard work takes time and I need to resolve to be patient and intentional if this is going to work. The blog will be anonymous, for confidentiality reasons, but it will be a nonetheless truthful account of me taking my health into my own hands. I encourage you to do the same.
**This blog has been posted to GrowHealChange, the blog of TRU Integrative Health & Wellness, on behalf of one of their patients. This patient wishes to remain anonymous.
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