Many
people often have experiences that we, in the psychology community
call ‘transpersonal’, 'spiritual' or ‘exceptional experiences of
consciousness.’ Exceptional psychology is a field that studies these experiences and phenomena which are traditionally related to parapsychology. Some examples of these type of experiences may include extra sensory perception, survival after death, out of body experiences, and after death communications. Depending on the nature of the experience and the
individual, one can find it to be very healing and positively
transformative.
Unfortunately, some refrain from sharing with
friends, family members, and “professionals” (such as clergy and
mental health professionals,) due to ridicule, invalidation,
judgement or even been labeled as a “brick short of a full load.”
There is a prevalent lack of openness and understanding in regards
to these exceptional experiences. I am a little different than many
of my peers in the field of Mental Health. I approach my clients and
others with a different perspective--one of a fellow experiencer, and
one educated in transpersonal or “spiritual” psychology, as well
as a Psychotherapist.
I
have been present for many peers and clients while they have shared
their accounts in transcendent realms, communications with deceased
loved ones, and more. These accounts can be very powerful, but there
are few words to fully describe the impact when you personally have
one of these experiences. I listen, empathize, understand, and validate these extraordinary subjective experiences, because I too have had similar exceptional experiences and life changing encounters with loved
ones who have passed.
Here
is my story: I was raised in the south in a small college town called
Milledgeville, GA. Almost every Sunday, my parents would take me and
my brother to go see our Granny, Annie Dean Garner, after church. She
had a quaint little house, with pictures of all the family members on
the walls, and a turquoise blue couch that I often played on in her
living room. She was a very sweet woman with long, brown and gray
hair that she kept braided on top of her head. She always wore her
glasses, and was warm and loving. I would spend the day hanging out
with her playing and helping around the house.
Later
on, during my early college years, we discovered that Granny had been
diagnosed with colon cancer. This was devastating to our family. I
remember my mom calling me and telling me “you’d better go visit
your Granny.” I went to the local hospital to visit her, and I
remember seeing her in the hospital bed. Although she was sick, she
was smiling and very appreciative that I came to see her. That would
be the last time I would see my Granny alive.
A
few days later, my mom and dad were notified by the hospital that
Granny was in a coma. I received a call and rushed to the hospital.
I ran into my father in the parking lot. He had a very concerned look
on his face, and, without saying a word to me, kept walking towards
his car. I quickly went inside, up the elevator and to the floor
where my Granny's room was located. I found my mother sitting there
crying. My mom explained that she was holding Granny's hand when she
took her last breath. My Dad could not stand to be there to watch her
pass.
Years
later, I had an experience that transformed my life in
a deep and profound way. One Sunday afternoon I was feeling tired, so
I chose to sit and meditate on my couch. I started to move into a
deeper state of meditation and began to feel my body less and less as
I rested with my eyes closed. I observed my thoughts, watching them
subside. As I was meditating deeper and deeper, I felt my head nod.
The third time I nodded, my head jerked. I opened my eyes and just
happened to look down at my couch. Something strange was happening.
My couch was normally beige, but now it was turquoise blue! When I
looked around, my vision seemed cloudy, but I could sense someone
sitting across from me.
I heard a familiar voice in my head say
"focus.”
I decided to focus and my vision cleared and I saw someone sitting
across from me in the room. It was my deceased Granny sitting in her
chair and smiling at me! I couldn’t believe what I was seeing!
I
thought to myself, “I am making this up.” My vision became cloudy
again and I heard the voice say “It’s your own fear and doubt
getting in the way. You need to focus.”
I
focused on the figure in front of me and my vision instantly
cleared. I saw my Granny sitting only a few feet away from me—she
smiled and stared at me. Her brown and gray hair was still neatly
braided and she wore her beautiful white gown.
I decided to go along with the
experience and told her "I miss you Granny, and I love you."
She
replied, “I love you too.”
I
asked, "How am I doing spiritually?"
Granny
replied, "You are doing well, but you should stay away from the
theological debates." (At the time, I had been having a rather
strong religious debate with a friend of mine.)
I
acknowledged Granny “I understand it is not my place to tell anyone
their beliefs are wrong.”
She
said "I love you. Take care of your father if he ever gets
sick.”
I
acknowledged Granny “I understand it is not my place to tell anyone
their beliefs are wrong.”
She
said "I love you. Take care of your father if he ever gets
sick.”
I
said "Granny, I need you to give me validation that this
experience is real and true.”
She
said, “Okay,” and led me into the kitchen where she showed me
squash and onions cooking on the stove.
She
said, "Ask your mother about the squash and onions she cooked
today."
I
said “I will Granny and I love you." I then felt myself coming
out of my deep meditation and back to my waking awareness.
When
I opened my eyes, the first thing I thought was that I needed to call
my parents to see if what my Granny told me was true. My heart was
beating fast with excitement as my dad answered the phone.
I asked
"Dad, did you eat squash with onions today?”
He
said "Yes. What are you doing, some kind of mind reading?”
I
replied "No, but you wouldn't believe me if I told you."
Dad put my mother on the phone and I asked her the same thing.
She
said: "Yes, I cooked squash and onions today and your aunt did
too." She asked me, “how did you know?”
I
told her, "I saw Granny and she told me what you did today.
Granny also told me to take care of dad if he ever gets sick."
I
am thankful to have seen my Granny again after her passing, in a non-ordinary or altered state of consciousness and having what I believe was a face-to-face encounter. This experience
had a powerful transformative effect on my life--I no longer feared
death. For me, I now have certainty that there is an afterlife, and
our loved ones are continuing their lives in another way. The
knowing she gave me in this encounter is what parapsychologists and
other researchers call “vertical evidence.” My Granny shared
corroborating information that I could then check, by telling me what
my mom cooked that day.
My
Granny did not come back to give me the secrets of the universe or
share the “right” religious beliefs. If anything, she urged me to
stay away from religious debates, and instead, guided me in another
spiritual direction. She came back to give me the simple message of
taking care of her son --my dad. It was a simple message of love.
This
profound experience helped me reconcile my emotions with not only the
loss of my Granny, but also with the passing of other family members
and friends. While the encounter has never taken away the initial
grief of saying goodbye, it has had the lasting effect of creating a
stronger ability within myself to understand and better cope with the
eventual passing of others close to me.
This
experience served as a significant catalyst for my evolution, both
personally and professionally. My biggest concern was no longer
whether or not I was going to ‘continue existing’ at the end of
my life, but now, how can I live to my fullest potential? If I were
to live to my fullest potential, I knew that my inner spiritual life
needed to be congruent with my outer life. My previous corporate
positions were not a good match for my newly-evolving spiritual life.
I realized that I had to follow my heart now, and move into a healing profession.
My
values shifted. No longer was I concerned primarily with achievement
and financial success. I was now more focused on serving and helping
others heal, grow, and transform in a deeper, more heart-centered
way. This life changing experience awakened a deep spiritual need
inside of me to become a Psychotherapist and Clinical Hypnotherapist,
with a specialty in religious, spiritual, and transpersonal issues
and experiences. I am now gratefully providing individual and group mental, emotional and spiritual support
for those with similar exceptional experiences.
I
send a very special thank you and I love you to my Granny, Annie Dean Garner.
Shaye Hudson, MA, CH.t is a Psychotherapist and Clinical Hypnotherapist in
Atlanta, GA with a Transpersonal orientation and training, who specializes in
Spiritually Transformative Experiences. He is also a Reviewer for the Journal
of Exceptional Experiences and Psychology.
